• 187



    You and your repetitive roommate are given putters of appropriate height and now stand in front of the only hole of putt-putt you’ll be playing today. There are two inclines, or paths, to choose from: one going down and the other going up. They both lead to the hole and you’ll both be putting simultaneously. However, you’re given some additional information on one of those little boards that describe the hole and its par number.

    [Shows a picture of the board:]

    Hole #1: Putter’s Dilemma

    Putt down (or up) the winning path and you’re free to leave! If not, you’ll be shot.

    You’re pretty sure you understand the decision matrix and you do your best to explain it to the other guy.

    “So can I count on you to choose the first path so we can both get out of here?” You’ve begun to ignore his repetition of words.

    “I don’t know. They’ve been really tricky in the past. Once they asked me what would happen if Pinocchio told a lie and the lie was that his nose would grow. I said that his head would probably start rotating on that wooden peg neck of his and explode, but it would probably be an infinite head explosion because it’s a paradox, like an infinite paradoxical causal loop. It’s what I imagine Hell must be like…those fiends…”


    If you bet on his cooperation and putt through path one, go to page 95.

    If you think he’ll secure his own life and liberty by choosing path two, well, quickly think of something else on page 76.


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